SSB Crew tries and fails to teach writing
by OneWingedHeron53
Summary: Alright, so you want to try your hand at writing. Then step in here and let us pros teach you how to write...What do you mean, we're not pros? I'm wasting valuable space explaining this? Alright, I'll explain the basics. -Ahem So three of the SSB crew gets together and teaches newbie writers how to write while the author is away. Click please unless you want me to Falcon Punch you!
1. Chapter 1

**Alright, fresh meat. I'm here to teach you how to make a decent fanfic. No, this isn't going to cover any yaoi or yuri, if that's what your looking for here, then turn away. This isn't a place for you.**

**Captain Falcon, don't you think that's a bit harsh?**

**I emphansize the bit...**

**What? We're going to teach fresh meat on how to make a decent fanfic. I'm tired of seeing stories that looks like it was thrown in the garbage by an experienced writer and some teenage kid who lives in the alleys picked it up and thinks it's going to be his break.**

**Yeah, your being harsh. Let me handle the Author's Notes.**

**Hello, one and all. Marth, Wolf, and Captain Falcon here to teach you the basics of writing. Now sit back and listen to our words.**

**I like mine better.**

**Come on guys. We wasted half a page trying to make a decent note. Let's get the show on the road.**

**XoXoX**

**Captain Falcon and his goons teaches how to write.**

**Captain Falcon and his goons?**

**What? It's a decent title.**

**I don't even know why your trying to help.**

**Let me handle this.**

**The SSB Crew tries (and fails) to teach how to write.**

**Why did you put the fail on there?**

**Because I got a feeling we're not going to live up to our standards.**

**Now we wasted an entire page on Author's Notes AND a title...**

**Alright, Wolf. Teach the basics.**

**XoXoX**

"Now what to write about?" Wolf wondered outloud, rubbing his hands together.

Captain Falcon then looked at the two others, "What? You don't even know what we're going to write?" He asked.

"Quiet." Wolf snapped and began typing.

_"So we meet here of all places." Link replied, greeting Rosalina who stood behind a deserted bakery._

_"It must be fate." Rosalina replied as she progressed towards Link_

"Are you still onto those two?" Marth asked as he read word to word of what Wolf was typing.

Wolf then turned towards Marth, "What? I'm teaching how to make a decent lemon and romance fic. It's why we're here, isn't it?" Wolf pointed out and began typing again.

"I think we're aiming at a kid-friendly fanfiction." Marth intervened, pushing Wolf away from the laptop.

"Oh please." Wolf called out, "What kid would seriously read, let alone write a fanfic?" Wolf mocked.

"The kind that writes lolnoob and omgyoufail and herdyulikemudkipz but mudkipz dunt lyke yu?" Captain Falcon pointed out.

"Those are trolls." Marth answered and began to think what to write.

"Kids...trolls. Not much of a difference." Wolf continued mocking.

_"Ah! Help!" Peach cried out, lying on the ground while in the distance a figure wearing a deep hooded black sweater ran with a purse in hand._

_Smashtopia. The final destination for Smashers around the globe. Yet, even in this paradise, crime lurks every corner. Theft occurs every night, Murder occurs every week. Arson occurs every month. Jaywalking occurs every hour. So who do people rely on for protection?_

_He is here. Faster then a speeding bullet. Stronger then an angry rhino. Immovable like a rampaging elephant. All villains and antigonists beware! For when someone calls for help, Super Do comes to the rescue!_

_Along with the explaination came a superhero wearing blue tights along with a mask to hide his identity. In his hand laid a regal sword, shining in the light. Floating in the air for a brief second to see who called for him, he saw the figure running across the road while the light was red! The fiend! Well, Super Do will end his crime streak._

_At that, he zoomed towards him like an eagle watching a mouse. When he came closer, he flipped and planted his feet on his back and using momentum to knock him over._

_"Your crimes end here vile villain!" Super Do called out triumphantly. He grabbed the purse that laid within his hands and placed his hand on his hood, "Now let's see the face of the criminal who will face justice..." He muttered as he pulled the hood to reveal..._

_"It's-a me! Mario!" He called out._

"What...is...this?" Wolf asked slowly.

"I'm teaching how to write a superhero story." Marth asked, still typing away.

"Super-do?" Wolf asked again, speechless.

"First thing in my mind." Marth answered.

"Okay, not only is that stupid." Wolf intervened, pulling the laptop away, "But why is Mario the criminal?" He asked.

Marth crossed his arms, "He beat me at the last tournament." He pouted childishly.

"Well, why are you the superhero?" Captain Falcon asked.

"Who would you rather me pick?" Marth snapped.

Captain Falcon only shrugged his shoulders, "You got half the look down." He mocked quietly.

"Hey! This cape is a sign of royalty." Marth pointed out.

"Whatever you say..." Wolf replied, "Super-do..." He added under his breath.

"Let me try." Captain Falcon asked, taking the laptop.

"Oh Gods..." Both of them replied at a loss of words.

_Captain Falcon ran through the halls of the mansion, wielding two smg's with various clips and two LGM's on his back. Behind him giving chase was various zombies, growling as it slowly, but intimidatingly made its way towards him. As he ran ahead, he did a cartwheel as he passed by a doorway, raising his arm and fired his smg at various other zombies that was making its way inside the building._

_Continuing to run, he placed his foot on the wall and lifted himself up and flipped down and used both smg's to fire behind him, emptying both clips. He then unloaded the magazines and slammed the guns on his hips where other magazines were ready to be used and flipped back onto his feet._

_Just then, another horde of zombies appeared from the front. He skidded to a stop and planted his back against the wall. He then crossed his arms and aimed his guns at both hordes and fired away._

_After the amazing battle there, he came upon the entrance, where more zombies came from the hallways. Just then Lucas appeared._

_"Captain Falcon. What's happening?" He asked, scared._

_"The inevitable happened. The zombie apocalypse is upon us. Come on, we got to get out of here." He answered, trying to open the door, only to find out that something was blocking the way._

_Before Lucas could join up with Captain Falcon, another zombie; wearing a black sweater with its hood on and crawling on the walls, leapt at Lucas with a terrifying scream. Before Lucas could do anything, he was already ripped apart by this boss zombie._

_"Damn..." Captain Falcon muttered as he planted his back against the wall to see a huge horde of zombies advancing towards him. He then dropped his smg's and drew his lmg's, loading the weapons and fired away. If he was dying, he was dying fighting..._

"Okay, seriously?" Wolf intervened, cutting Captain Falcon who was posing as he was in his story.

"What?" He called out, "What's wrong with a little zombie horror?" He added.

"Not only is it incredibly stupid." Wolf insulted, "But's it's been litteraly done to death thousands of times." He added, taking the laptop.

"I thought it was cool." Captain Falcon muttered quietly.

"Plus, where were we?" Marth asked.

"I think you were off fighting your own little zombie battles. Although I think Zelda became a Witch and Donkey Kong became a Tank from LEft 4 Dead." Captain Falcon answered, adding a little detail.

"Yeah, we're going to try to write this without bringing in other franchises." Wolf pointed out.

"But you brought in Rosalina." Captain Falcon called out.

Wolf then sighed, "Rosalina is part of Nintendo, therefore she doesn't count." He pointed out and began wondering what to try next.

Marth then noticed a figure coming up the doorsteps, "Uh, guys...I think the author is back." He pointed out, looking out the window.

"Crud...we ran out of time." Wolf muttered disappointingly.

"Quick, get the DT." Captain Falcon replied.

Wolf then dugged into his pocket and pulled out a device. The three then stood in the middle of the room and Wolf activated the device.

"Damn, I forgot to log out!" Wolf called out, but it was too late as the device produced ten rings that covered them and transported them across dimmensions.

Just then the author walked in and went straight to his laptop and noticed something. "Who's been using my account?" He wondered and read the above text. "They didn't even explain anything." He pointed out, but shrugged his shoulders and closed it anyways. He then grabbed one of his cups and left the room, then the trio arrived again.

**XoXoX**

**And there you have it fresh meat. You've taken the first steps of becoming a master writer.**

**We didn't teach anything Captain Falcon, now hurry up and load it up.**

**Quickly, he's coming back.**

**Hurry, transport us.**

**Captain Falcon! What are you doing?**

**DT = Dimmensional Transporter.**

**Review please!**

**I'm coming!**

**Just one more quick note from the author. This was meant as the three trying (and failing) to teach how to write. If anything of the above offend, I apologize and the three will pay for it later.**


	2. Attempt No 2

**Hello, we're back.**

**Along with Link and Rosalina, unfortunately...**

**I'm only here to make sure you don't do anything with us again.**

**And why is SHE here?**

**...Peach is making me babysit her again.**

**I don't need a babysitter.**

**Come on Wolf, I thought you made it clear that we shouldn't waste space on Author's Notes.**

**Alright. No more quip from you three.**

**Hmph...**

**XoXoX**

**The SSB Crew tries to succeed in teaching how to write stories.**

**That's a rather long title.**

**You have something better? Never mind, don't do anything. Let's just start.  
XoXoX**

"Is Peach making another bet about you two again?" Wolf asked, crossing his arms, "I didn't get the memo again." He muttered disappointingly.

Link then turned his head towards Wolf, "What bet?" He asked in a stern voice.

Marth in turned facepalmed.

Seeing this, Captain Falcon placed a hand on his shoulder, "Well, that's one way to stop wasting space on Author's Notes." He reassured.

"This is flaming bait." Marth muttered.

Captain Falcon then placed both of his hands at the back of his head, "Looks like your playing the Only Sane Man again." He pointed out.

"What about you?" Marth pointed out.

Captain Falcon gave another grin, "I got a feeling I'll break soon." He answered.

Rosalina then called out, "Will you two stop it? We're annoying the others." She cut the other two off.

"Why are you defending Marth?" Wolf pointed out.

Link then had a lightbulb appear on his head...

"How did you do that?" Captain Falcon asked, tapping the lightbulb.

"Why don't you go see what Marth is doing and let me figure a way to get the two of us AWAY from each other?" Link asked, ignoring Captain Falcon...until his tapping caused the lightbulb to fall and shatter on his head, causing him to elbow Captain Falcon in the ribs.

Marth however, saw through Link's plan, "Oh no. You leave me out of your love life." He pointed out, getting up and away from the two.

"She is NOT the love of my life!" Link shouted annoyed.

"Others would think otherwise." Wolf pointed out amusingly.

Rosalina then sat on the chair and pulled the laptop, "ENOUGH!" She shouted annoyed as well, "Let's just get this thing started." She added and began clicking the links on the account.

"What are you doing?" Marth asked, standing behind her along with Link and Captain Falcon.

"Have you tried answering the previous reviews?" She asked, clicking on the review list.

"Yes, and if we're lucky, Captain Falcon scared them away." Marth replied.

"If we're lucky?" Captain Falcon pointed out.

Marth then sighed, fisting his hands on his hips, "So they won't come back and see this embarrassment." He pointed out.

Captain Falcon decided it was time to change topic and began to pick at the bone that was bugging him, "You know what I always wondered?" He started, causing Wolf and Marth to look at him, "How exactly are we able to manifest on the Author's Laptop? He pointed out.

Marth only look at him in thought.

Captain Falcon then started again, "I mean. How are we able to manifest to the author directly?" He cleared out.

Wolf then cleared his throat, "From what I understand, the Author possesses the abilty to reach into the fiction world and interact as if they knew him directly." He answered.

"Sounds like what some crazy fangirl would do if they wanted a certain character." Link pointed out as he and Rosalina continued to look what happened previously.

"It does." Wolf called out, "However, he is different then them as he loves to put the fictional world in certain scenarios whether its inhabitants like it or not." He explained the benefits of the Author's position.

The five were silent for a while until Captain Falcon broke it, "Is that why half the fictional world are trying to assassinate him?" He pointed out.

"Would be a logical assumption." Marth answered.

"How do you know this?" Rosalina asked.

"Well, let's just say I was somehow able to interact with him directly and he took the advantage and tried to give the fictional world a target." Wolf answered as he did not regret it.

"And your fine with this?" Marth pointed out.

"I'm too cunning for them, so they gave up on me and retargeted the Author." He pointed out quickly.

Rosalina then grabbed a brick out of the desk and threw it over her shoulder, which impacted Wolf directly on the head.

"What was that for?" He called out in pain.

"For putting me and Link in that scenario again." She pointed out, getting to the part where Wolf tried to teach on writing a lemon.

"Anyways, we're off topic, so let's begin." Link pointed out and began typing.

_"When darkness transcends the mortal plane. When sunlight no longer shines upon the world. When the weak are no longer allowed to live. Who do they depend on to save them?"_

_After that, a single solitary light appeared on the top of a hill. There stood Link, although not in his usual attire. Instead, he traded the Hero's Garb for an Angel's Robe. Wrapped around him in elegant sense, his sleeves flapping in the wind. The robe itself split apart at the waist, allowing it to flow behind him in the wind. Even his bottom-wear was garbed in pure white slacks. Even his shoes shone on elegantly. Reaching behind him, he pulled out a blade, not the Master Sword, but a more thinner blade, sparkling silver and its hilt was gold decorated with various gems. His blonde hair, not its usual dirty blonde look, but rather a silky soft flowing blonde._

_As he rose the blade, the darkness itself began to retreat. This Link then took small soft steps, the dead grass reviving at the touch of his feet-_

"His black, dirty feet!" Rosalina put in, pushing Link out of the way.

"Hey! I resent that!" Link shouted back as he regained his balance.

Marth then shook his head, "Angel's Robe?" He pointed out in sarcasm.

Link then looked towards the blunette, "You rather I put flowing white robes?" He asked, completely missing the point.

"Um, isn't your Hero's Garb your shtick in the Hero business?" Captain Falcon pointed out.

Link then sighed, "Truly? I would like it if I could go on an adventure without wearing the traditional Hero's Garb." He replied.

"Not going to happen." Marth pointed out.

Wolf then stepped up and pushed Rosalina away from the laptop, "Not in fanfictional stories." He pointed out as he began to type.

_The Legend of Zelda - The Final Frontier.  
Infinite darkness. Void between galaxies. Shining stars at all directions. Ganondorf has managed to kidnap Zelda (again) and somehow embarked on an incredible journey throughout the stars. Pulling out a weakened Master Sword, he embarks throughout other galaxies where the true temple of the sages lie. Along his journey, he meets an interesting cast of characters to the mysterious Yoshi in its natural habitat._

_As that played out, a Yoshi promptly chased after a Shy Guy with a look of murder in its eyes._

_The cool, but determined lupine of the stars._

_As that played out, Wolf flew by in his Wolfen._

_To the princess of stars herself, Rosalina._

_As that played, Rosalina just stood there._

_Together, the two embark on a journey leaving the other two behind just so they will have all the time in the galaxies for themselves/_

"Yeah, that's not going to work." Link cut off, pushing Wolf away from the laptop who tripped and fell onto the floor.

Rosalina tossed another brick behind her shoulder which made a satisfying clunk.

"Let me have another shot." Captain Falcon called out as he cracked his knuckles.

"Well, can't be any worse then what they wrote..." Rosalina muttered quietly.

Marth however, kept his arms crossed, "Want to bet?" He asked in sarcasm.

_Captain Falcon continued to run along the halls, running away from something dangerous and deadly that wanted to beat his brains out._

"Wait, I thought you already did an epic zombie apocalypse?" Wolf asked, rising up with a noticable bump on his head.

"This isn't a zombie apocalypse..." He started out, still typing away, "This...is a mutant apocalypse." He finished and continued to type, ignoring the groans of everyone in the room.

_"Got to hurry..." Captain Falcon muttered to himself. He recently discovered the source of all the mutants that wanted to kill him. So he figured if he gets rid of the source, then everything would go back to the way it was._

_"He's coming..." A raspy voice called out between coughs._

_"I'll handle him..." Another called out, lugging his big arm that the mutation gave him._

_As Captain Falcon reached the stairs to his destination, the big arm emerged._

_"Ganondorf?" Captain Falcon asked bewildered._

_It was Ganondorf, having his left arm shrunk to a useless state while growing his other arm to monstrous sizes. Without giving word, Ganondorf began to charge, holding his mutant arm in front of him._

_Captain Falcon then reared his fist and flames began to engulf it. "Falcooon..." He started, biding the time to unleash it. When Ganondorf got a few feet close, he swung his fist, "Puuuunch!" At that. The charge stopped in its tracks and Ganondorf was sent flying into several debris._

_After an epic battle at the floor of the building, which included a gigantic Donkey Kong that was surprisingly tough to take down. But now, he got to the destination he figured was the source of all the mutants._

_"Grr...they failed!" The raspy voice snapped out, coughing between fits again. "Send the last of them!" It added as another pair of mutants emerge from a capsule in the room and went out of the room, "Make sure he doesn't get by!" It ordered, tolerating its cough._

_However, as the last mutant left the room, another Falcon Punch later, not only did he send the mutants back into the room, not only did he single handedly stopped the mutants, but he also knocked down the wall._

_Captain Falcon took deep steps as he walked in, "So you are the source of the threat." He called out, observing what the mutation has done ot it. Its neck grew a few inches to the side, where on the neck nonfunctional tentacles grew. As it coughed, it let out a type of smokescreen to further hide its identity. "Once I defeat you, not only will I stop the mutant rampage, I'll also save the world. I'll be a hero!" He remarked, looking at the final thing that the mutation gave it._

_Hanging out of its mouth was its own tongue which could possibly connected to its intestines as well, "I'm sorry I have to do this. But I won't let you destroy the earth." Captain Falcon remorsed as he lowered his head, "But I will defeat you!" He shouted, finally getting to its name, "Lucas!"_

Marth then lowered his eyebrows, "Do you have something against Lucas or something?" Marth asked, keeping his arms crossed.

"Why do you ask that?" Captain Falcon asked, putting in the finishing touches of an epic battle.

"This is the second time you put Lucas in an uncomfortable situation." Marth pointed out, "And what did we say about bringing in other franchises?" Marth added.

Captain Falcon only smiled innocently, "I didn't bring in any other franchise." He answered.

"Oh sure, there's the Charger, a Tank, and a Smoker!" Wolf counted on his fingers.

While the three continued to argue, Rosalina sighed, "At this rate, they're not even going to get to the part about grammar." She muttered to herself quietly.

Link looked out the window, "Guys? He's back." He announced as he saw the author walking along the road.

"Quick, load it up." Marth replied as he began digging in his pockets.

**XoXoX**

**And there you have it. You've taken a second step to the path of the Master Writer.**

**Hurry up Captain Falcon, we don't have time to explain the various notes we left open to interpretion.**

**Fine...Anyways, review please.**

**Wait up!**

**Charging DT now. We're out of here.**


	3. Third Attempt

**Right, we're back.**

**Well, two and a half anyways.**

**Wolf decided to get some timeoff and is going to be replaced by Lucas for this chapter.**

**H-h-hi Fanfiction.**

**Anyways, we need to post another chapter up. Last I checked, this one is already four pages back.**

**It's not like we can post every week, people are going to think we have a screw loose in the head if we post every day.**

**Meh, people already think I have a screw loose.**

**I wonder why.**

**Shouldn't we write something now?**

**Okay, little munchkin, write a story.**

**XoXoX**

**Lucas joins the fourth wall**

"Fourth wall?" Captain Falcon asked.

Marth then crossed his arms, "You do know that we basically passed the fourth wall by manifesting on the author's laptop?" He called out.

Captain Falcon then looked down in thought, "Never thought about it that way actually..."

"Wait, I thought us being beyond the fourth wall is dangerous?" Lucas pointed out.

"Well, yes. There is a couple of dangers that awaits us fictional characters in the real world." Marth answered.

"Like what?" Lucas asked.

Marth then looked down in thought again, "Well, for starters, there are those who..." He started, looking for the most appropiate word, "Desire us." He finished, "They'll do anything to get to be in our presence." He added.

"We call them fangirls." Captain Falcon called out, looking through various websites.

"Yes, fangirls. They'll do anything they can with us." Marth concluded, "Quite frightening actually. If it weren't for no one knowing where the author lives, then we would be facing danger the moment we manifest here." He finished his dialogue.

"Take this Tifa Lockhart chick from Final Fantasy 7 as an example. Stick her in the middle of a busy street and fanboys would be crawling at her feet." Captain Falcon replied, opening a picture of the woman.

"What have we said about bringing in other franchises?" Marth scolded again.

Captain Falcon only shrugged his shoulders and began typing.

_In the year 2045, mankind started to travel the stars. However, as they returned home one day, bringing a live speciman from a distant planet, things went horribly wrong._

"Which apocalypse is this now?" Marth asked annoyed.

"A bug apocalypse!" Captain Falcon replied with glee. "Big nasty bugs, with huge pointy teeth and acidic saliva." He added and continued to type.

"I don't like bugs." Lucas replied, standing behind Captain Falcon.

"No one likes bugs." Captain Falcon answered, "That's why this apocalypse is favored among others." He pointed out.

"Not exactly." Marth replied quietly. "So what torment are you putting Lucas through this time?" He asked.

"What?" Lucas asked out in surprise.

"Well, I actually wasn't going to use him this time. Having a kid torn apart and digested in acidic liquid would inspire night terrors in many." Captain Falcon replied, revealing he actually has standards.

Lucas already quivered at the words.

"Well, unless he wants to be part of it. I mean, the only reason he was a part of my previous stories because I didn't want to make him feel left out." He continued to speak.

"Listen to him buttering the audience." Marth replied, looking directly at the fourth wall, therefore speaking directly to the audience.

"But maybe I will include him but give him a death befitting a Hero." Captain Falcon added, already typing in the words.

"And there he goes ruining it." Marth replied towards the audience again.

"No!" Lucas all of a sudden shouted, pointing his finger and making an icicle on top of Captain Falcon's head.

Captain Falcon didn't flinch at the sudden cold, "Guess I deserved that." He replied and brushed off the ice.

Marth then looked at his pockets and noticed that the DT was shining. "Incoming travelers." He replied.

The rings then came in the middle of the room and a light shone, making two figures appear.

"Sorry we're late." Wolf announced as he and Link arrived from the other side.

"What kept you?" Captain Falcon asked.

Link then stretched his arms, "It's amazing how one missing number can lead to a lot of trouble." He started, causing the others to look at him interested.

"We tried to come earlier, but as he said, we forgot a number and we got involved in a ritual where we were to be sacrificed." Wolf finished up.

"That's...stupid." Lucas replied.

"You try appearing out of thin air in front of a group of cannibals. They'll fatten you up and sacrifice you." Wolf snapped towards Lucas.

"I'm sorry, don't hurt me!" Lucas cowered, covering his head.

"Leave the kid alone." Captain Falcon defended, deleting his previous bug apocalypse story.

Marth then removed Captain Falcon off the chair and decided to write as the two duke it out in the background.

_Sirens can be heard out in the background as one man wearing a blue trenchcoat walked along a hallway._

_"When crime fills these halls?" A voice narrated out in which the man came across a door that said 'Marth, Private Investigator' which promptly collapsed as the man was attacked, but retaliiated by twisting the attackers arm and threw him throw the window. "There's only one man who can deal with it." The man then lifted his fedora hat revealing Marth._

_Marth said nothing and only pinched the left of the hat and slid it to the right. He then walked off._

_"Marth PI. Coming this Summer"_

"Private Eye Marth." Marth smuggly replied, "Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?" He asked Lucas who sat at the side watching the two fight.

Captain Falcon dodged as Wolf swiped at him. Wolf took this advantage of pulling out his blaster and pointing it at him, but Captain Falcon knocked it out of his hand, landing under the desk. As he recovered, Captain Falcon grabbed a nearby acoustic and bashed it on his head, breaking several strings as well as making a big hole on the guitar.

"Hey!" Marth called out, "We're trying to keep a low profile. For all we know, the author doesn't even know we come here and use his account." He called out, getting up and going towards the two.

"I think the author would be smart enough to know that someone is using his account." Wolf pointed out.

Link stood guard, looking out the window, noticing some strange activity outside. "Something's happening out there." He called out, then looked at the three and noticed they didn't hear him, "I'll be back, I'm going to check it out." He added, grabbing the author's sweater and putting on the hood.

Lucas, seeing as the three are busy and readers are probably going to get bored, he sat at the chair and began to type.

_"Hello, I'm Lucas." He started to narrate. "A perfectly normal boy..." He continued to narrated, then a big dog came along barking fiercely, he then pointed his finger, having a frostflake appear on his finger and promptly froze the dog in a giant ice cube. "Okay, not so normal."_

_He then walked inside a house, "I live in a small humble town that has little to no excitement. I own a shack which I live in with my pet Mr. Saturn." He pointed out, in which a strange creature with a huge nose and stubby legs walked along._

_"Like I said, it's boring and the biggest excitement is someone getting a papercut." He replied and lied on his bed, in which he slowly started to fall asleep. "However, as I thought nothing would be exciting, something happened..."_

_A tornado appeared out of nowhere grabbing the little shack and tossing it away._

_"After a while of resting, I awoke to the most puzzling sight."He replied and stood up, looking out the window where dozens of Mr. Saturns walked towards the house._

_Walking out, Lucas noticed they were standing around the corner, "After a few silent and confusing exchanges. I realized they were thanking me, because in a fortunate chain of events, I crash landed directly on top of their ruler, which was told to me in beeps and honks (Don't ask) that he was ruthless and merciless." He explained. He then took a look at their ruler which was a giant left hand._

_"Now they offered for me to stay and continue as their ruler, but I couldn't. I had a life back home, no matter how boring it was, my place was still there." He narrated and walked along the ruby red road, "So they told me to get home, I need to go see the wizard." He added._

_"I eventually reached the wizard, who was, in fact a giant right hand." He pointed out as the hand in question was wearing a wizard hat and surrounding in a ball of flame._

_"I'm burning! Get me out of here!" Said the wizard. I thought it was pretty cool appearing in a ball of flames._

_"O Great Wizard!" I called out, going onto my knees, "Although this is the most exciting thing that has happened to me, I fear that I am needed at home. Please grant my wish and send me to my home town." I pleaded, watching the giant hand writhing in pain as he continued to burn._

_"Oh, and these guys have wishes too." I pointed my thumb backwards at the three individuals I eventually met along my journey. The three were Marth; the Tin Woodman, Captain Falcon; the Scarecrow, and Wolf; the Cowardly Lion._

"Why am I the Cowardly Lion?" Wolf called out, the three having stopped the fight.

Marth looked at the entire script, "Your just retelling the Wizard of Oz replacing the characters with us." He pointed out.

"So? It's better then the crap that came from your minds." Lucas pointed out, looking at his almost finished work.

At that moment, Link came running in with tattered clothes, missing chunks of hair, a tooth missing, and a panicked face. "We got to get out of here." He replied, slamming the door and pressing his back against it.

"Why? What's going on?" Marth asked and noticed his fellow Smasher, "And what happened to you?" He pointed out the obvious.

Captain Falcon gave a little amused grunt, "You look like you tried to shave a lion's mane with a rusty razor." He mocked.

"I hope that mock isn't directed at me." Wolf muttered with arms crossed.

Link however, continued to breath heavily, "Much worse then that." He replied in fear. The three paying attention began to get concerned, "THEY know we're here." He revealed a shocking revelation.

They all widened their eyes as something began to bang against the door. "Crud, the fangirls are here." Captain Falcon revealed their attackers.

"Quick, load it up Lucas." Wolf shouted as he fumbled in his pocket to get the DT.

**XoXoX**

**Now I don't know what so terrible about these fangirls, but the other four are obviously afraid so we'll leave it here now.**

**Hopefully my involvement in this chapter loosened things up a little. If so, then just say the word and I'll try to include myself in future chapters.**

**Hurry up Wolf, get it out.**

**Damn, you made me drop it! Get it!**

**So review please.**

Just then as they left, the fangirls broke in and groaned in disappointment when the five Smashers were gone. Just then, they perched themselves on the ceiling as the door opened and the author walked in.

"Why is my door broken? Why is my favorite sweater ripped? Why does it smell like perfume in here?" He called out as he opened the window and left the room to let it air out. The fangirls took this opportunity to leave silently, despite all their shrieking and squeeing earlier.


	4. Long chapter title

**Is the coast clear?**

**I see nothing outside the windows, we should be safe for now.**

**As long as the three of us remain inside. Let's get started.**

**Right. -Ahem- So we're back. Captain Falcon, Link, and myself; Marth.**

**Wolf couldn't join us because he came back earlier to try and publish another lemon of Link and Rosalina.**

**What? Again? Sheesh, that guy won't leave me alone.**

**Unfortunate for him, fangirls ambushed him and he's been hospitalized within the Mansion. Rosalina occasionally comes by to drop bricks on him.**

**Anyways, back to topic on hand, enjoy our next step at becoming a master writer.**

**Wait; we're actually going to teach something?**

**I'm 5% sure we'll teach something.**

**XoXoX**

**The SSB Crew tries to respond to reviews...and writes along the way.**

**That's a rather long chapter title.**

**XoXoX**

Marth sat on the chair and opened up the reviews; "Let's see. We got three reviews from DarkLordLink; one from Virgofox28, and finally another from lyokolife6." Marth replied as he read the reviews.

Link then crossed his arms and looked out the window to keep watch; "What do they say?"

Marth then read out DarkLordLink's reviews.

Captain Falcon then lowered his eyebrows; "He speaks as if the entire thing is a fanfiction. Including our carefully detailed Author's Notes. I hope I took more then a handful of braincells off of him." He grimly replied.

Link continued to look out; "What's the next?"

Marth then read out Virgofox28's review.

The three didn't say anything, but instead crowded towards the laptop and looked at Lucas' retelling of the Wizard of Oz.

Captain Falcon then backed off; "He's only lucky because he wasn't interrupted like we were." He concluded.

The two quietly agreed with the review.

Link then returned to the window; "The last?"

Marth then read lyokolife6's review.

Captain Falcon quietly sat back and looked at his manuscript; "I suppose I shouldn't upload the story where Lucas is the first to die in a meteor attack?" He wondered to himself.

"Unless we want to lose reviewers. No." Link concluded.

"Well, I suppose we don't have much time to write before the fangirls realize we came into their dimension again." Marth pointed out and began typing.

_In this time of strife. People are massacred left and right. With the rise of a new government figure; many changes came. While some changes favored the rich ones up the state, the ones in the poorer state had a different view. It is at this time that a rebeliion is inevitable. However; this story doesn't take place at the birth of the rebeliion; it takes place when a group of people are captured and being driven via airplane to an island where they would be imprisoned._

_A plane flew pass the sky as its engine gave a roar. In the cargo hold of the plane are several prisoners, dressed in an orange jumpsuit with a mask over their face with tubes inside their mouths keeping them unconscious. However; one managed to keep the tube from entering his mouth. Traveling light, there was only five incompetent guards keeping patrol._

_The man opened his eyes and quickly took in his surroundings. They kept it protocol that two people be chained together and so the man carefully looked to who he was chained two. He looked at the tag with the initials C.D.J.F. Prisoner Number 23. Wondering who he was, he quickly dismissed it as one guard came close to him. Being incompetant; the guard walked too close to the man who launched his plan of escaping._

_The man got up quickly, wrapping his free arm around the guards neck and quickly snapped it. Hearing a noise; another guard looked towards the source and quickly brought up his rifle. The man dugged around the now dead guard and pulled out a combat knife where he quickly threw it and buried itself within his forehead. The man then took off his mask, revealing blue hair and blue eyes along with fair skin. He tore off his tag; Marth._

_He then pulled off the mask of his chained companion revealing; "Captain Falcon?" He muttered in disbelief. But shook it off as he pulled off the tube and shook him awake._

_"Five more minutes..." He mumbled, turning his head._

_"Come on." Marth quietly snapped as he got the man up._

_Captain Falcon then mumbled as he was harshly awoken. "Wha-what? Where are we?" He asked._

_"Shh...we're in a carrier." Marth answered and dug in the dead guards pockets pulling out a set of keys. He fumbled upon putting in several keys, turning them to try and get the cuffs off. Finally, he found one and the cuffs came off the two men. "Get the others awake, but don't bother taking off their cuffs yet. We won't have time for that." He ordered and Captain Falcon obeyed without question._

_After a quick ten minutes and taking down two more guards, everyone was awake and was trying a set of keys to free themselves._

_"Stay here." Marth replied and walked off towards the cockpit._

_Captain Falcon nodded and went to the others to tell the plan._

_Marth quietly strutted along, keeping a lookout for the last guard that was mentioned in the database. When he saw no one, he came across the cockpit and slowly opened the door. He quietly walked along to dispatch the last guard. However, as he came to visual, he widened his eyes. "Sheeda?" He called out._

_The girl in question looked at the man; "Marth?" She called out equally surprised._

"Who in the world is Sheeda?" Captain Falcon interrupted.

"My wife." He revealed.

"Whoa-whoa-whoa. Your married?" Link asked surprised.

Captain Falcon smiled; "Ha! Take that yaoi fans." He insulted, although he was ignored.

"If she's your wife..." Link started out, "Why did you put her against you in your story?" He pointed out.

Marth then scratched his head, "For irony and drama?" He sheepishly answered.

Captain Falcon stood up and took the laptop and began to open Internet Explorer.

"Honestly?" Marth called out, "I think our relationship is just like the relationship between you and Zelda." He pointed out.

"But we're not together." Link pointed out, "We view each other as brother and sister." He continued.

Captain Falcon then look towards him, "Is that why she was talking to you about dating Ike earlier?" He asked.

"She occasionally comes to me when she wants to know if it's alright with me to do various things." Link answered.

As the two continued to speak, Captain Falcon began to write; "Since I tore my manuscript up, I'm going to continued Marth's, but focusing on someone else." He replied to himself in which Marth and Link ignored as they were discussing various things.

_"Marth?" She asked, equally surprised. However, with Marth surprised, she took advantage of as she noticed that is he's awake and free, then the others would be too. As a last resort, she pulled down the lever to open the cargo bay door._

_Taken by a sudden wind, Marth flew back hitting his head against a wall, knocking him out cold._

_Back at the cargo bay, everyone looked in terror as the light and alarm blared that the door was opening. As it opened, a huge gust of wind picked up, already taking a few unlucky victims. The remaining group tried to grab hold, but were unfortunate in that they all flew out of the cargo hold._

_**Few hours later**_

_After the messy launch, all were fortunate enough to exist in fiction and thus, survived the fall. Its was in the middle of the night, estimated 3:00 in the morning. One more hour before daylight begins to break. All prisoners took what remaining darkness they have and began to run. Word reached the main base on the island and already a group force along with tracking dogs were pursuing them. Deciding to cover more ground as well as increase the chances of at least one group escaping, they all split up._

_This story is focusing on a certain Hylian Hero and his chained companion._

_As they ran, they tumbled down a hill before falling into a ditch. Which was fortunate as the guards pursuing them jumped over them and continued to run. They stayed silent as they jumped over the ditch and waited a few minutes before crawling out where no guard was in sight, but barks were still heard._

_"We don't have much time." Link pointed out and finally decided to look at his companion only to widen his eyes. "Oh, come on." He muttered._

_His companion had a similiar reaction, "I'm not as thrilled to be chained with you." She answered._

_"Why does this always happen?" He continued asking himself._

_Just then, a helicopter shone its spotlight at the two, "I found subjects Three and Thirty-Two. Identified as Link and Rosalina." The helicopter announced loudly._

"Stop it." Link interrupted as he had a similiar reaction as the two in the story. "Why am I always tormented of being paired up with Rosalina?" He muttered to himself quietly.

Marth then gave a smirk, "Maybe you should ask Zelda about her." He teased.

"Shut it." Link snapped, leaving a laughing Marth and Captain Falcon. His ears then twitched, "Shut it." He replied again, only for Marth and Captain Falcon to continue laughing. Seeing as they were only going to continue to laugh, he pulled out his own DT and dialed himself out.

"I think we angered him." Captain Falcon continued to laugh between breaths.

Marth continued to laugh until he noticed that the cup of tea that was unfinished by the author began to vibrate. "I think he left for a different reason." He pointed out.

Captain Falcon then looked out the window, "They're here!" He called out in terror as the shrieks became louder. "Load it up, I'll hold them off." He ordered as he began to push his back against the door, where banging began to commence.

**XoXoX**

**So, our absence was because we were waiting for the fangirls to cool down. Sorry for the long wait. Unfortunately, we have to be away for a while again to wait for the fangirls to cool down.**

**Yes, I am married to Sheeda, just don't ask why my wife was involved and against me for that manner.**

**Marth! I can't hold them off any longer.**

**So review please! Loading it up.**

Marth then pulled out another DT and just before he could finish, another set of fangirls broke in through the window and glomped him.

Hearing Marth's screams of terror, Captain Falcon then tackled them off of him and put in the last set of coordinates and disappeared within the dimensions.

Again groaning with disappointment, the fangirls quickly fled as the author walked inside the house. "My door is broken again?" He called out and looked in terror as his window was smashed as well. "That's it. I'm calling the cops." He pointed out and looked towards the floor where he noticed a piece of blue garment and blood on the floor.


	5. Long title sequence

**Are you sure we'll be alright here?**

**The author changed locations so we should be alright within this vicinity, so long as we don't jump out the window shouting where we are.**

**Marth is not here for this chapter, so we'll have to do without him.**

**In other terms, let's not make a huge mess without him to kept us in place.**

**Right -Ahem- Link, Wolf, and Captain Falcon here to finally teach something.**

**XoXoX**

**The SSB Crew finally decides on to teach something and have a remote chance of actually succeeding in their lesson.**

**Th-**

**Not a word, Captain Falcon.**

**XoXoX**

"Are we seriously going to increase the length of our chapter title's each chapter?" Captain Falcon asked.

"No comment." Link answered, moving onto the laptop and began a simple draft.

"So what is this remote chance of us teaching something?" Captain Falcon asked, looking at the chapter title.

Link then pulled out a notepad from his Hyper Space Arsenal, "Marth gave me this notepad giving directions on what he planned to guide us on." He replied, flipping the pages.

Wolf then frowned, "How did he get the highest authority in this group?" He pointed out.

Captain Falcon then wondered, "From what I hear, he's the sanest man of this group." He answered simply.

Link then shrugged his shoulders, "Would be a logical explanation." He muttered to himself. "Okay. Step No.1: Write a decent summary." He read out.

"What's wrong with our previous summaries?" Captain Falcon asked.

Wolf then turned around to face the racer, "That's the problem. We never attempted one." He pointed out.

"What about the summary for this story?" Captain Falcon pointed out.

"That doesn't count." Link replied as he began to write a summary.

_"Five hearts. One warrior, one racer, one mercenary, one princess, one hero. Tales combined makes up the most epic adventure ever told in transcending history. Meet Link, the Hero of many souls, the narrator of this grand tale..."_

Link started to type up a summary...

_"...and as he travels through the cosmos, meets the princess of stars and love blooms faster then Garfield finding lasanga and through interventions of time..."_

Wolf cut in quickly finishing the summary. Link then backhanded him away from the laptop as he read something about meeting a child of the future. "May Rosalina's brick find you through time and space." Link threatened as Wolf bumped against the wall after the push.

"Oh please." Wolf muttered as he regained his balance. "There's no way she could have read that..." He replied.

Captain Falcon looked out the window, seeing an unusual sight, "Guys? What's that?" He pointed out.

Upon hearing the news, the other two looked out the window to see a fireball, "Why that looks like..." Wolf started out until the fireball smashed through the window and collided with Wolf in the forehead.

Link then crouched down and picked up the object, "A brick?" He called out as he examined the brick. He then turned the brick around and saw a picture of a Lume carved into the stone, "Rosalina's brick..." He called out.

Captain Falcon leaned on his knees and examined the brick over Link's shoulder, "Do you guys have some sort of psychic connection or something?" He pointed out.

"Courtesy of Princess Peach." Link answered, putting the brick down.

Captain Falcon then got curious, "What did she do?" He asked, moving towards the laptop.

Link then sighed, "Long story short, she made a cake and asked us if we wanted a piece. Sure enough, we accepted the cake and after eating it. She revealed that she put transmitters in our slices. Which by advanced technology, allows us to hear, see, and even taste what the other is eating or drinking." He explained in short terms as possible.

"You were babysitting again?" Wolf asked, getting up with a bump on his forehead.

_"I don't need a babysitter!" _Rosalina's voice echoed in his mind.

Link then sighed, "Well, tell Peach that!" He shouted at no one in particular.

"Wait. You hear her voice all the time?" Captain Falcon asked.

"Yes, I do. I lost a couple of nights sleep because of her. Do you know how loud she snores?" Link answered, pointing out the disadvantages of an otherwise advantageous situation.

_"I do not snore."_ Rosalina pointed out.

Link then made a cross on his head, "Your snoring could trigger an avalanche 200 miles away! Good thing you live in space, otherwise we'd have an incredible problem with the economy!" Link started to argue.

Captain Falcon and Wolf looked at each other awkwardly as they didn't hear Rosalina's voice. But suggesting from the argument, she was speaking to him now.

"Maybe your snoring is the cause of blackholes!" Link continued to argue.

_"A good thing your not in the open, otherwise I'd lob another brick towards your direction.!" _Rosalina insulted back.

"We're wasting time listening to them." Captain Falcon replied and went to the laptop.

_"What if Roy..."_

"Your seriously doing a what if?" Wolf interrupted.

Captain Falcon then turned to him, "What's wrong with a what if?" He asked.

Wolf then sighed, "The list goes on, but on every review page I see that has a summary starting with a what if, many people flame it." He answered.

"It could be just that it's a newbie writer." Captain Falcon pointed out.

Wolf then looked at the laptop, "All the reason we don't use a what-if to start a story." He replied.

"Okay." Captain Falcon mumbled as he deleted the draft, "How about a highschool AU?"

"Filled with cliches and done to death."

"Zombies"

"Already tried zombies."

"Modern AU?"

"Like a highschool AU, filled with unnecessary objects like drugs, crimes, and things that would make this story have a M rating."

Captain Falcon then crossed his arms, "It's surprisingly hard coming up with a decent summary." He admitted, still thinking.

Wolf then looked at Link, who was still in a mental argument with Rosalina, "I think I got one." He replied and took the laptop.

_"Sharing minds with the other. One man is going to have to learn to live with the other in his head to escape impending doom. The woman is going to have to learn to trust his judgement if she wants to escape a loveless marriage which her mother arranged for her..."_

"What are you doing now?" Link asked, apparently ending the mind battles.

Wolf then lampshaded this, "Why are you not arguing with your friend?" He asked.

Link then crossed his arms, "She decided to keep quiet and go for a nap." He explained and began to mentally count as he heard loud snores within his mind.

Wolf then looked at the summary, "I was trying to be in Marth's shoes and thought like him to come up with this." He replied and handed the laptop to Link.

Link then nodded, "Decent, as long as it's not about me and Rosalina." He pointed out as he noticed the similarities.

Wolf then placed his hands behind his back and looked upwards, "Why would I do something like that?" He asked, along with a halo appearing above his head.

"Okay. Out-of-Character and Creepy." Captain Falcon muttered. He then decided to change the subject, "Where is Marth anyway?" Captain Falcon asked.

"Master Hand chose him to scout out the games shown at E3 next week. He's also concerned that's where our next game is going to show." Link answered, typing down several sentences on the computer.

"You mean he's seriously walking among the mortal plane?" Captain Falcon asked, concerned of the prince's welfare.

Wolf continued to look out the window, "You know cosplayers?" He asked, looking at the event horizon, "Marth plans to claim himself as a cosplayer, while cosplaying as him." He finished, explaining Marth's plan.

"Wonder what he's doing now?" Captain Falcon muttered.

**Elsewhere**

Marth continued to walk around the area where E3 is to be shown. They were already starting to setup and various workers continued to type on computers, possibly updating their site news. He was currently dressed in a not-so-inconspicuous leather trenchcoat, a fedora, and sunglasses.

"So far, so good." He muttered to himself. So far, he only received curious glances, which he is guessing is his choice of attire.

Just then several young girls; possibly highschool, walked up to him. "Excuse me, do you know where the hotel is? We're participating in E3, cosplaying as our favorite characters." She asked, handing a map of the area.

Marth looked at the map, as it was foreign to him, he made several mumbles, "There's a hotel not too far from here." He pointed out with his thumb.

"Kay, thanks. You participating here too?" The girl asked.

"Uh, yeah." Marth answered. He thought he gave off a threatening presence so others won't bother him, yet here's a couple of girls who thinks otherwise.

"Cool. You cosplaying too?" She continued to ask.

At this point, Marth was starting to sweat. What if they saw through his disguise? "Yeah. I'm going as Marth from Fire Emblem." He continued to answer.

"Awesome. I'm going as Sheeda. We should get together later on." She replied and; to his pleasure, walked away, "Ciao!"

Marth then sighed, "Easy boy. Your playing with fire." He muttered quietly to himself and continued his walk. He then felt concerned for some reason, he became concerned of the others welfare. "I hope the others are doing alright. I'm not there to keep them in place." He muttered to himself, "I hope they are doing okay."

**Back**

"THE FANGIRLS ARE HERE!" Captain Falcon shouted, running in a circle.

"I ONLY HAVE HALF-A-HEART!" Link shouted as well.

"I FORGOT THE DT!" Wolf revealed.

Wolf then screamed while the other two followed suit.

**Elsewhere**

"I'm sure they're fine." Marth muttered and walked back to his hotel room.

**XoXoX**

**Huh, what's all that shouting. Can't a princess get a rest around here?**

**...What's going on down there? Oh dear, they got caught by the fangirls who are starting to tear them up. I got to help, but how? As I'm not an official member of the SSB facility, I'm not allowed to intervene...don't know who came up with that rule, but it's there.**

**...**

**I know. I'll relay a message to Lucas and he'll teleport them back in their dimension...Genius.**

**I'm also sure that they would want this uploaded, so I'll do it for them.**

**As I'm doing that, I may as well ask for reviews.**


	6. Noobies try to teach writing

**Um...hello?**

**No need to be shy, sure it may be a new crew, but we still have our pride.**

**Shut up, Captain Falcon. This is our first time here.**

**My second time.**

**Well, I'll just go ahead and explain the basics. -Ahem- Captain Falcon here, along with Lucas and noobies; Zelda and Ike.**

**I prefer the term first-timers.**

**Marth, Link, and Wolf are currently in the infirmary after the attack from the fangirls.**

**They got out thanks to me!**

**Enough pipsqueak. Anyways, we're onto the next chapter of us "trying" to teach you guys something...keyword is trying.**

**XoXoX**

**Noobies try to teach something.**

**Captain Falcon!**

**What? It's the right length for a chapter title. Our previous chapter titles were sentences long.**

**That's not the point!**

**Guys? We're wasting space on the Author's Notes.**

**XoXoX**

"Anyways. Should we go into details on why the original crew are in the infirmary?" Zelda asked.

"I understand that Link and Wolf were severely ravaged to the point that they are lucky to be fictional characters. Any ordinary human would die from that." Ike explained, then turned to Captain Falcon, "And if I heard right, you were attacked too." He pointed out.

Captain Falcon gave a big smile, "Yep."

"And how are you in a better state then the other two?" Zelda asked.

Captain Falcon leaned back with his arms behind his head, "I have a higher tolerance to pain." He answered.

"Must have something to do on how he's always under a constant amount of pain." Lucas explained.

"Seems about right." Ike muttered.

Captain Falcon then sat straight, "But wait. What happened to Marth?" He asked.

Zelda and Ike looked at each other, "He told us to write what happened in story format." Ike replied, going to the laptop and pulling out a notebook which had Marth's name on the cover.

"Let us watch noobies at work." Captain Falcon whispered. Then a light shoe; Zelda's presumably, hit his head with a silent thunk.

_"So far so good." Marth muttered to himself. He felt exposed, he felt some girls will glomp him and tear off some of his clothes for souvenirs. He felt naked, standing in the middle of E3. He looked around and saw pretty poor cosplayers of himself. Some with imitations of his sword that were too big or too small...not to mention they were cardboard. The color of the wigs were too light or too fluffy, or even too long._

_"Hey, Marth!" A voice he heard a few days earlier called out._

_Freezing and gulping in fear, Marth looked at the source, and although she wasn't recognizable at first, he knew that it was her. But cosplaying as his wife, Sheeda. Although it was almost perfect, it didn't have the beauty Sheeda personally had. But they don't know that they actually exist in a parallel world to theirs._

_The Sheeda cosplayer, along with an Ike and Roy cosplayer, walked up to him. Marth looked at the Ike and Roy cosplayers and saw one major thing that the real Ike and Roy had that they don't. They were men. These cosplayers were female and as such, the Ike cosplayer was thin and without muscle (as well as having a slightly larger chest); as well as having Ragnell a bit too big and...did the real Roy have a double chin? Because this one does..._

"Can we just get to the point?" Zelda asked, interrupting Ike's typing.

"Fine." Ike answered and pressed the enter key and began a new paragraph.

_By some cruel twist of fate. Marth was in the center of a huge group of girls who wanted a piece of him as a souvenir..._

"Wait, how did he get in that position?" Captain Falcon asked.

Lucas looked at the sentence, "He's right. The readers will be asking how he got in that position."

"Will you guys shut up and LET ME TYPE!?" Ike shouted, already feeling the pressure from the group was giving him.

_Marth walked out of the theater where they showed the trailer for the new Super Smash Brothers and was already in fear. He saw the stage Arena Ferox which he heard about somewhere in his future. He was worried that he would not make the cut and be replaced by that female who dressed like him; Lucina._

"Who?" Captain Falcon asked.

"Lucina. A girl who was introduced in the next game of our series." Ike answered, still typing away.

Lucas stood behind the desk and was puzzled on how smoke would be rising from Ike. He figured Ike wouldn't know much about technology yet here he is typing up at a speed that would put most author's to shame.

_"Hey, you!" A male's voice called out, "The Marth cosplayer!" The man finished._

_Knowing he was addressing him, he looked ahead and saw a red-haired man who had long hair tied back. He began thinking on who he was. He remembered Ike talking about a cussing man who was steps away from becoming a pedestal for Ragnell. He stood alone and his bow and quiver seemed real._

_Once he went to him, the man pulled him back, "Alright, here's the picture. Are you the real deal?" He asked, holding him by the collar._

_Marth placed his hand on Falchion and was ready to attack, "Who are you?" he asked._

_The man dropped him, "My name is Shinon, and if I'm correct, you too are not suppose to be here in the real world." He introduced himself._

Ike all of a sudden stopped typing, "What in Ashera's name is Shinon doing there?" He called out and looked inside the notebook again. He then decided to skip a couple of pages ahead.

_So as he found out, Shinon had access to enter the real world where he began to smuggle some drinks he calls Pepsi to his realm._

"I always wondered where he got that from..." Ike wondered to himself.

_The two silently walked along the battlefield of the fangirls, taking caution with each step. Marth keeping his hand on the hilt of Falchion while Shinon held onto his bow tightly, not attempting to give their status away by holding onto his arrows. After all, it would attract attention if one holds onto an arrow._

_"So what brings you here?" Marth asked Shinon._

_Shinon looked around, looking for a specific thing, "I ran out of Pepsi, so I came here to get some more. Don't ask how I got involved in E3. It involves a cow" He explained his reason of being there._

_Marth began to wonder why a cow would have to do anything with his being here. Then he figure some things were left unanswered. "It doesn't have something to do with that new crossover game with Fire Emblem and that Shin megasomthing whatta..." He pointed out, with Shinon looking at him confused at the last bit, "I forgot what it's called." He added._

_"Shin Megami Tensei x Fire Emblem." Shinon pointed out, "I seriously deserve to be on there!" He suddenly shouted._

_Marth smiled, "I don't see you getting a spot as it only applies to Heroes it seems." He pointed out._

_"I helped Ike defeat Ashnard and Ashera! I totally deserve to be there." Shinon quickly pointed out._

_Marth then sighed, "If you helped him defeat said people, then hundreds will be angry they won't get the cut. Which will eventually cause an international war between time and space." Marth explained the reasons why he wouldn't be able to join as the conflicts between the space-time continuum can be very destructive if one wasn't careful of their actions._

"Oh, your getting in another crossover game?" Zelda asked excitedly.

Ike smiled, "Seems that way. I got a contract not too long ago." He replied, pulling out a piece of paper.

Zelda then frowned, "Your not going to leave Super Smash Bros, are you?" She asked, worried of his absence.

Ike then looked ahead, "I'm not sure. I told Master Hand to keep my contract if I want to renew it. But I might not be able to handle being in two crossover games at once." He explained.

"Why are you two worried of each others absence for some reason?" Captain Falcon asked, leaning back on a chair with his hands behind his head.

"Well, we're sort of dating." Ike answered slowly.

Captain Falcon then fell back, "What? Seriously?" He asked surprised.

Zelda then closed her eyes, "We were dating for a while already." She added.

Lucas looked outside the window, "Wow, your dense. Even I knew that." He replied sarcastically.

"Shut up, Pipsqueak!" Captain Falcon insulted the boy.

"Anyways, I'm skipping a couple of pages again." Ike replied and went to the laptop again.

_"I'm not calming down!" Shinon shouted, starting to get Marth worried._

_Marth quickly made motions to get him to be quiet, but to no avail._

_Shinon then grabbed his hair, "Is it the hair? Is it because I don't qualify for the You Gotta Have Blue Hair department?" He again shouted, heading towards a nearby store where they sold blue-hair dye._

_"Shinon no!" Marth shouted, grabbing his shoulder, but it was too late as all attention was directed on them and Marth could start to hear heartbeats. "Oh no."_

_Shinon then noticed his mistake and gulped in fear._

_"IT'S ACTUALLY THEM!" A girl shouted in the back. Marth recognized the voice as the girl who was cosplaying as his wife._

_"I WANT A LOCK OF HAIR FOR A SOUVENIR!"_

_"FORGET THAT, I WANT A HANDFUL!"_

_"I CLAIM THEIR UNDERGARMENTS!"_

_"I WANT A FINGER AS A SOUVENIR!"_

_Then squealing started to erupt like a volcano and rumbling started to occur within their vicinity. "You blew it, Shinon." He muttered to him quietly who only nodded in agreement._

_The next few minutes resulted in a massive dog-pile like none has ever seen before with Marth and Shinon at the bottom. Luckily for them, the fangirls lacked the ability to physically wound them, so they still had their fingers. Just then, rings of light appeared on the two poor men and they transported away from them, leaving a massive groan of disappointment._

_"Guys, wait till you hear what I found out!" Another girl came along shouting, "There are three more in our world and they are at some loser's place typing a story." She revealed._

"This can't be good." Ike replied, realizing what it meant and typed quickly.

_"To the loser's house!" Another girl shouted._

**Far away**

The author was currently in a local store holding a basket and shopping for groceries when all of a sudden he sneezed.

**Back to the loser's...I mean the author's place**

"Hurry up. They'll be here soon." Zelda rushed Ike, holding onto his shoulders. Ike was currently on the fanfiction site and was getting impatient.

"C'monc'monc'monc'mom..." Ike repeated.

"Curse the author for having snail's pace internet speed." Zelda shouted.

The author at the store sneezed again.

Captain Falcon however wasn't worried, "Come on, they're half-ways across the world. It's not like they'll break down the door and try to take our fingers." He replied confidently.

"Don't underestimate them." Lucas pointed out.

"Lucas, get your DW ready." Zelda replied.

Captain Falcon then sat up, "DW? Don't you mean DT?" He asked.

Lucas then lifted his wrist, "No, DW. Dimensional Watch. Allows faster and safer traveling between dimensions." He explained the new wrist watch teleportation.

Captain Falcon then pulled out his DT, "Really? I have to prime mine first." He replied and began typing within the device.

Just then, everything started to shake. Signifying that they are nearby.

Ike finally uploaded the story and was currently waiting for confirmation, "Hurry up." He muttered.

The door then started to bang.

"It's done!" Ike answered.

At that, the door broke down revealing a huge party full of cosplaying girls who were squealing with delight.

Lucas and Ike successfully transported while Captain Falcon was still priming his.

"C'monc'monc'monc'mon..." Captain Falcon replied, looking at the device which read as '98% complete. "Your almost done." '99%' "HURRY UP!" He shouted.

He then successfully transported, leaving Zelda who then wondered, "Wait. I'm a girl. I don't need to worry about the fangirls." She pointed out to herself.

However...

"It's Zelda!" One quickly pointed out the obvious.

"She's the one who is taking Ike away from Soren!"

"And Roy!"

"And Marth!"

"And Elincia!" Another quickly shouted in the background, then all eyes went on her, "Right, we're yaoi fangirls..." She muttered.

"GET HER!" The leader of the lioness pack shouted.

At that command, they all charged at her.

Zelda quickly baffled by this, only shouted, "OH!" She then pressed the button on her watch and successfully transported.

"You better run." One of them shouted.

Outside, the author pulled up in his driveway and immediately noticed that his stairs was smashed under combined weight, "Oh come on." He shouted annoyed.

Hearing his voice, the fangirls immediately disappeared into the night...despite it being daytime. The author then entered his room, seeing that they were gone, "This time I'm ready for this." He replied as he went to his bookshelf, pulled out a book which had a hole at the side, opened it and revealed a camera recording. "This time, I got them on tape."

**After quickly watching**

The author was quiet. He didn't know what happened. Sure he allowed the Smashers to write stories on his account, but what he didn't know what to answer was how to explain to the police that a bunch of girls in costumes destroyed his house. Grimacing for a while, he deleted the video and tossed the camera behind his shoulder and went to go fix his steps.

**XoXoX**

**That was close. Are you injured Zelda?**

**I'm fine. Thanks.**

**Ike! There you are. This came in for you.**

**Dear Ike. We've reached a...strange implement at the Greil's Mercenaries. Shinon applied something to our water and now everyone has blue hair. Any idea how this happened?**

**From, Titania.**

**I don't know whether to laugh or cry...**

**Well, all I can say is, hope people review our first chapter, facing incredible odds of surviving in the real world!**


	7. Chocolates and Pepsi's

**It's quiet...too quiet.**

**Just step out of your transporter already.**

**Am I the only ones who thinks it's too soon after last months incident?**

**I'm momentarily sure we're safe for now.**

**Key word is "for now"**

**Anyways, today is me; Marth, along with Captain Falcon and Ike. Today we're joined up by a new member, Lucario and the beautiful Queen of Altea as our guest. Sheeda.**

**Hi fanfiction!**

**I'm still wondering why she's here of all people.**

**Your forgetting one more!**

**Oh yeah, this ankle-biter here is Shinon. He came here to try to involve himself more so he can get into Shin Megami Tensei x Fire Emblem.**

**I TOTALLY DESERVE TO BE ON THERE! AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN ANKLE-BITER?**

**Anyways, let's start this up.**

**HEY! DON'T IGNORE ME!**

**XoXoX**

**The SSB Crew tries another attempt**

"So Ike..." Marth started; looking at Shinon as well who had blue hair, "How's things back at the base?" He asked.

Ike lowered his head and sighed, "Titania scolded Shinon and told him to get rid of the blue-hair dye. The bottles said the dye will wear off eventually." He answered, still looking down.

"And?"

"Shinon dumped it into the ocean and everyone in Tellius has blue-hair." Ike finished quickly.

Captain Falcon snickered as well as having Sheeda raising her hand to her mouth. Shinon looked away from Ike's angry glare, Marth laughed a little as well. Lucario stayed in the back with arms crossed, not making an expression.

Sheeda in turn, looked outside the window, "Wow, I never been outside to the real world before. Let's go check it out!" She called out excitingly.

"How about no?" Marth sternly answered, taking a seat on the laptop.

"Aw, why not?" She asked disappointingly.

Ike turned towards her, "In case you didn't get his various memo's, every time he's out here, he risks his life. Even just by being in this room, he's risking his life." He then paused to look around, "We're all risking our lives." He mystically added.

Everyone was quiet; making even Lucario raise an eyebrow on how quiet it is. Until Sheeda blinked, "What memos?" She asked.

Marth immediately lowered his head and began typing various sentences.

"He doesn't write to you?" Shinon asked, surprised at the fact.

"He never sent me memos." Sheeda pointed out, causing Marth to lower his head even more and type faster.

Ike then smacked him behind the head, (read Dope Slap) "She's your best friend, your wife, and your Queen and you don't even bother to write to her?" He scolded like a father to a son.

"I was getting to it." Marth pointed out, flinching from the attack. He then noticed everyone else; (except Lucario) was staring at him, seeing through his lie. "I just didn't get the time." He added quietly.

"What else do we do besides fight and come here?" Captain Falcon pointed out.

"Let's just start a story and take it from there." Marth interrupted and began typing.

Sheeda however, looked down in thought, "Seriously, what memos?"

_Sheardears. Annoying fairies that will only appear to a selected few. So what happens when four good friends who are attending camp decided to take a stroll through the forest? The blue-haired leader; Marlin, his brother Mike, Mike's girlfriend Hilda, and her twin brother Lincon._

"Nice names, like we don't know who they are already." Captain Falcon mocked as he read Marth's writing.

"Shut up."

_Then one day, as fate would have it, they found a strange cave. Now, as any sensible person would do, they would leave the cave alone. However, seeing as the story would end then, they decided to go in the cave to discover the strange light._

_As they came across a particular barrier, something shocked them and they fell unconscious._

_As hours went by, the four awoke to a strange sight. A woman with long, blue hair and eyes to match watched as they got onto their feet. "Hullo!" She called out cheerfully._

_Marlin immediately stepped back, "Who are you?" He asked._

_The woman gave a heartwarming smile, "Caeda's* the name. And asking obnoxious questions is my game." She introduced herself._

_Hilda stood back as well, "A Sheardear?" She asked surprised._

_Lincon leaned towards Mike, "My sister read about them. Apparently they're annoying." He pointed out._

_"Anyways, as I said. Caeda is my name and this is my pet; Faldoug and this is a troll going by the name Sheen..."_

Captain Falcon immediately lowered his face while Shinon looked away, "Your one-step away from a bulls eye." He threatened.

"Where are you going with this?" Ike asked, feeling everyone in the room; (barring Lucario) unease and discomfort of this.

Marth then started a new paragraph, "We'll see."

_As they later found out, only the four could see Caeda and her pets. Reaching the camp counselors; Samantha, Luke, and Han, they immediately diagnosed that the four were now insane and chose to isolate them._

_Fortunately, they were able to convince Samantha and Luke to help them. With Luke's medical training, he found that the four now have three tiny mechanical devices in their heads that would be harmful to get out. Now Samantha, their engineer adviser, concluded that since it's a piece of technology, it should still be vulnerable to Electro-Magnetic Pulse Waves. So, in short notice, the four were alone in the room with the EMP generator._

_"Samantha's instructions are pretty clear." Marlin pointed out holding a note that had two sentences. 'Push the red button' and 'DON'T PUSH THE BIG RED BUTTON!' On the machine were two buttons. A finger-sized button and a hand-size button which were, in fact, red._

_The troll Sheen then appeared. "What's this?" He asked. Although a troll, he was quite adept with the English Language._

_"It's an EMP Generator." Hilda answered._

_Sheen then looked curious, "Ooh, is it a toy?" He asked, leaning around it._

_"It's to make you go away." Lincoln answered without remorse._

_"Go away?" Sheen asked in despair, "Why do you want me to go away?" He added and teleported to Lincoln, "I don't want to go away. I want to stay with my friends!" He shouted in despair._

_"Your not our friend!" Lincoln again answered with no remorse._

_Hilda decided to show sympathy, "Well, with your power of suggestion, you can potentially cause harm to other people or us." She replied in a soft tone._

_"Hilda" Mike called out quietly._

_Sheen then teleported to Hilda, "I would never hurt you guys. I just want to live! I want to go surfing or mountain climbing. I WANT TO EAT PIE!" He pointed out, mentioning his favorite past times he recently learned._

_Marlin primed the device, "Okay, it's set. We just have to press the button." He mentioned._

_Lincoln then went to the button and was about to press it when Sheen teleported directly in front of him, "Wait! It's my size right? My gigantic size could step on someone's toe and have them sent out. I'll become smaller!" He pointed out and vanished in a light, reappearing hand-sized on the EMP Generator. "How's this?" He called out._

_Mike responded by moving towards the generator._

_"Wait!" Sheen called out again and disappeared in a shining light, now reappearing thumb-sized. "How can anything this teensy-weensy harm anyone?" He called out in a tiny voice._

_Mike responded by pressing the button._

_"No!" Sheen shouted, turning into his original size and started looking at his hands, "Oh sacre bleu. I'm melting! Melting!" He called out dramatically as he started to phase. "What a world. What a world!" He called out as he began to disappear from view._

_"The pulse hasn't gone off yet. It's on a timer." Hilda pointed out._

_At that, Sheen stopped his phasing and looked at Hilda, "Really? How much ti-"_

_At that, the pulse gone off and he disappeared from view._

"Alright, enough of that." Ike interrupted, pushing Marth away from the laptop.

Marth was protesting, "But, but, I was going to make the characters sing Row Row Row Your Boat at the same time to show that it didn't work."

Captain Falcon then looked at Lucario, "Why don't you write something?" He suggested towards the Pokemon.

_"I refuse." _He finally telepathetically spoke within the chapter.

Sheeda then looked at him, "Oh come on. We're all contributing in this segment, so you could at least write a few words." She pointed out. She then crossed her arms, lowered her head, and placed a finger at her cheek thinking of a way to get him to write a paragraph at least.

"Why are you here anyways?" Captain Falcon asked.

Lucario looked at Marth who was still trying to make his way to the laptop but stopped by Ike several times, _"Master Hand is concerned that Marth is losing his sanity so he sent me to watch out for him." _He replied, watching as Marth was starting to toss several mundane objects, like pencils and paper at Ike.

Sheeda then snapped her finger, "Ah, I know. If you write a few paragraphs..." She started.

Lucario closed his eyes, _"I told you. I refuse." _He interrupted.

"Ah, ah, ah." Sheeda called out, "I haven't finished."

_"Whatever your offer. I won't write..."_

"I'll bake you a chocolate cake if you write." She finished her proposal.

Captain Falcon reached out towards her, "Sheeda, no!" He warned.

But it was too late as Lucario's eyes widened and turned blue for some reason. He then rushed towards the laptop, _"Move, fool!" _He shouted, shoving Captain Falcon towards the swordsmen.

"What have you done?" Shinon asked unamused as he sat by and watched the Pokemon type up a story.

Sheeda then looked towards him, "You don't sound very amused." She pointed out.

Shinon then leaned on his hand, looking away, "Meh, I don't really care that much." He replied, closing his eyes.

Sheeda then came up with another scheme on how to check out this world, "In that case. Let's go walk around outside." She replied cheerfully.

"Why would I do that?" He asked in a bored tone. Regarding last time he was in the world, he wasn't sure if he would go back to public.

Sheeda then gave a mischievous smirked, "I'll help you smuggle some Pepsi." She suggested.

At that, Shinon opened his eyes, "Really?" He called out.

Captain Falcon finally got free from Ike and Marth as the latter was still trying to reach the laptop. He then noticed Shinon and Sheeda missing from the group. "Hey, where'd our two guests go?" He wondered to himself. He then looked towards Lucario who was typing...

_"CWOJWRCQJNJEVRER"_

Captain Falcon looked closer, trying to see what he's writing...or what he's trying to write.

Lucario noticing Captain Falcon focusing on his writing sighed, _"Damn these big paws."_ He muttered to himself.

Captain Falcon straightened his visor, "Move aside. I'll type for you." He suggested, pushing Lucario aside, who had no problems excepting his help.

_In this cruel and unforgiving world, the land was torn apart. Lands cracked open, reclaiming all life that it lent. Seas swallowed everything it can to sustain itself. The sky raged with storms, trying to calm down the land and sea at the cost of irreversible damaged. Man existed on land, repelling all forces of darkness that the land would send to gather them. Another variant of man lived within the sea, fighting a losing battle against all odds against the sea. While the last variant lived within the sky. Falling as they lost their wings._

_When all hope is lost, a light would shine. The light that would help man conquer their raging gods. The light from the very moon itself. In their plea for help, the moon gave them symbols. Symbols that would lend them great powers. With their newly found powers, man expelled the forces of nature to the point of discarding their religion and starting a new one with the moon._

_However, the moon was a very busy and merciless entity. It gave these symbols to all man that could range to talking backwards with ease to controlling the very fabrics of time. When a child is brought onto the moon, they are put into a ceremony at night where they would receive their symbol. Depending on the phase of the moon would produce the power with a full moon giving the most powerful._

_However, should a child be born on a new moon or by events of an eclipse, the moon would refuse to give them their symbols. Seeing as the moon would reject them, society began to reject them. Families would not want them, children would laugh at them, and even authorities would want to do nothing with them. These children, later growing to adults would be called "Unblesseds"..._

"Unblesseds?" Captain Falcon called out. "The whole story is starting to sound like that game Infinite Undiscovery." He pointed out and looked towards Lucario who was holding the case Infinite Undiscovery.

Seeing that he was ripping off a story, Lucario tossed it aside, _"I got nothing else."_ He replied.

Captain Falcon then turned towards the laptop, "Okay then...what else?" He muttered to himself.

At that point, Shinon came bursting into the room holding various cans of Pepsi with some dropping onto the floor (And not busting luckily.) However, he was panicking at the same time.

"We have to get out of here." He replied, briskly walking towards the group.

Captain Falcon looked at the red...blue-haired sniper, "What's going on?" He asked and noticed the absence of the blue-haired Queen, "Where's Sheeda?" He pointed out.

"I have to thank Marth for having such a stubborn wife." Shinon replied, placing his load of Pepsi on the floor in front of him. "She's fighting against the fangirls outside." He mentioned and grabbed Ike by the ankle, dragging him towards the Pepsi. "Get us out of here."

Ike looked at Shinon at first and realized that he saw fear in his eyes, so without second thoughts, he activated his watch and transported to their dimension.

At that moment, Sheeda came bursting in, having an obvious flare on her head. She went towards Captain Falcon, "Move it." She demanded.

Captain Falcon obeyed without question and moved, priming his newly acquired DW.

**XoXoX**

**Those fangirls really are stupid. They insult my beauty, my hair, and they treat me as trash because I'm Marth's wife and lover. I don't know where they got the idea where Marth loved Roy, or Ike, or that Link character. Let's go Marth.**

**But, I'm not done...**

**LET'S GO MARTH!**

**Coming Sheeda.**

_**I want my chocolate cake.**_

**You'll get your damn cake. Come on!**

**Before I leave, let me just point a few things out.**

**Sheardears = Sheeda. Marlin = Marth. Mike = Ike. Hilda = Zelda. Lincon = Link. Sheen = Shinon. Faldoug = Captain Douglas Jay Falcon. Samantha = Samus. Luke = Lucario. Han = Master Hand.**

**The * stands for Caeda which I am to believe is what Sheeda is called in these parts. The story Lucario took is pretty much the same story as Infinite Undiscovery, except the war against the land, sea, and sky. The Unblessed are also pretty much treated as trash.**

**Captain Falcon. We're leaving now.**

**Review please!**


End file.
